i can understand where you're comming from. i too grew up with my mother who was very religious, and turned to drugs. i remember a long time ago my mother was a good mom, but then drugs took over her life. i have spent majority of my life trying to get my mother off drugs and show her that her family suffers, i had no luck. there were times that she would try to get better, but then she would go back to her same life. one thing i can say to you is you will never forgive her, even if one day you say you do. i think the reason is we can't get back the days that already past, the times im sure you needed her, you cant get them back. you want your mom to be the mom she once was, but it is hard to look at reality and realize, she isn't that person anymore. who your mom is now is who she is, now. even if she changes, you will never see your mother the same way again. you will feel you can't forgive her, the hurt will always be there, like i said, the days that pass you cannot get back. i also think that because your aunt and dad don't see a problem, neither does she. by your father taking care of her, he is her safty net, the reason she doesn't need to get better because she is still well takin care of, there are no consequences to her actions. And to answer to your question is you are not a bad person or daughter to distance yourself from your mother. that is what i did and that time away from my mother has made me realize, i do love my mother, i am mad at her, but i cant change her life, this is who she is now and until she wants to change..this is my mother. i charish the good times with my mom, and give her credit for the good mother she was in the past. now i see my mother on occasion and by accepting her, she doesn't bother me so much.
