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Donna

My husband and I are separated for the last 6 ...

My husband and I are separated for the last 6 months. My family hates my husband and his family doesn't like me...typical. We are considering a reconciliation but I'd like to keep it quiet from my family until we've gone to counseling and worked out at least some of the major issues. He insists that I tell my family before going to counseling. He won't go to counseling unless I do. Our break up was very tramatic for everyone involved, particularly my parents. Am I being unreasonable or is he?

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psychology, marriage & divorce, family & relationships

Posted 2009-10-25T04:09:06Z
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brosen

1610 answers

506 helpful answers

I think that your husband is wrong. Even though it is difficult to separate a couple from their respective families, they should not be involved in the initial counseling. If you and your husband, during and after counseling, become resolute about your reconciliation you will both be strong enough to withstand you respective interfering families. I gather from your letter that both your families had an important role in your separation and that is why they should both be kept out of the picture.

Posted 2009-10-25T08:15:54Z

In reply to Donna's question

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lawbug

671 answers

140 helpful answers

Equal justice for All

The law works but the system needs changed, We all abide by the law but sometime it failes us. The same with the goverment. God bless the USA, Brign our troops HOME safely, To the men who did not get the credit they deserve, MAY GOD WATCH OVER OUR SERVICE MEN.

First of all if you you or him did not marry the famileys you married each other as much as i hate to say this tell your famileys to stay out of your marriage it not theirs and stay out of your business. If you try you can make a go of it but its your and your husbands decesion only and not the famlies. Yes they are inlaws only but please remember its your parents but if you are smart you will see them only and i mean this him and his parents and for you young lady only you and your parents but do it seperatly not as a couple and see what happens from there on as it will only work that way. So stay away from your inlaws on both sides if you want your marriage to work. If this what the two of you want it is hard to do but do it as so many times people cannot get aloung with inlaws been there done that it works out better that way. As for being unreasonable you both are at fault but talk things out and settle a problems before getting back to gether no matter how big or small they seem to you.

Posted 2009-11-07T21:25:03Z

In reply to Donna's question

lawbug was invited by Yedda to answer this question.