I love psychology and I've been dealing with a lot lately...

I think in order to get back to your old self after having the problems you've dealt with is to love yourself.  I don't know what your circumstances were, but you have to love yourself and have the confidence in yourself to put yourself out there, and to be that person.  Being outgoing and fun to be around comes with a price.  You have to be confident in who you are and know what you want and who you want to be.  When you do know what you want, where you want to be, and who you want to be, then you'll be able to flaunt that personality.Good luck!!

Hi Charles, Self-help is the first step. Doing things that promote a healthier outlook and addressing things you have control over is good. Eating a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, regular exercise, all these things contribute to good mental health. If however, you find that this is not enough, you need to take steps toward getting help from a professional. I recommend http://www.annamorten.com/ . It is a dangerous practice to diagnose your-self, because you have not been trained /educated to do so. You can educate yourself, yes. But, some things you aren't completely aware of can be determined by someone who has a more objective perspective and specializes in the treatment of such. So, do what you can for yourself, and then seek treatment if and when it is not enough to completely recover on your own.

You have already taken the first step.You've decided you want to be fun-loving and outgoing.Second step,do it.Go somewhere,have fun and love it.Go to Maxim.com,read the joke list,find a funny one and tell it to the next person you see.Make a paper airplane at work and fly it with sound effects.If you have children,buy a water gun and shoot them with it.If you have a wife or girlfriend,run through the house wearing nothing but a base ball cap and running shoes yelling "I am running"in your best Forest Gump impersonation.True confidence can only come from success.Once you have successfully made yourself and others laugh,gone out had fun and loved it your confidence and optimism will grow.Bottom line is this,don't wait for it to happen,make it happen.

 Dear Charles,

     You have "hit" upon a common challenge. The "stuff" of this challenge exists within your mind; within your psyche. In order to make these changes that you speak of you must "dive" into your psyche to discover how you are using you "tools." Your "tools" are your thoughts, beliefs, and expectations. With these "tools" you create your reality. There are also fears that we can "store" within our psyche that will also affect our beliefs and thoughts, thus affecting our reality. We must deal with our fears directly. Take charge and understand that fear is based on illusion.

     Look into the way you view your world, your life, your reality. How do you feel about yourself? How do you feel about your place in the society in which you live? How do you feel about your relationships with others? These are the things within your psyche that you must look into. It is here where you will find your answers. Here you may find beliefs that you have about your social life that are actually hindering your activities and enjoyment of social experience. When you find limiting beliefs about yourself or your environment change them. Change them into beliefs of positive action. Change the way you word your thoughts and keep them always in the present tense. This takes practice and a considerable amount of work. Be diligent.

     The person you wish to be is already within you. You have only to free 'him.'

                               With Kind Regards,

                                                       Daniel

Dear Charles, what should your first step be? Well, first of all I feel that you need to examine what happened in your life that caused you to stop being the person you once were. We can't go forward until we know where we've come from, in other words how we came to the point where we are. Surround yourself with joy: children, joy of helping others less fortunate, find love then give of yourself completely & totally, laugh out loud a lot, make new friends who embrace hope, love, peace, & joy. Join a church & become involved, give of yourself whenever possible, sit quietly & watch a sunset, read postive books that will reinforce what you're desiring in your life. Actually the best one I can recommend is the Bible, it is the book for all seasons in our life, able to provide whatever we need, want, & desire. But first you must understand how you lost your old self in order for you to retrieve it all again. Good blessings to you, seek & you shall find, Trishahearon