Basically, I've been with my boyfriend for 16 months now.. A long, hard, amazing, wonderfully hectic, rollercoaster 16 months that I wouldn't take back for the world. When I met him he was charming and sweet and was head-over-heals for me, which felt amazing since he used to be a "man-whore" so I felt pretty damn special.. I was going into freshman year at a very admired public high school, which is harder to get a 4.0 in than the local private schools.. and he was starting his junior year at a local continuation high school because he didn't get enough credits.. he wasn't a bad kid. Sorry if this sounds horrifying to you, but like an typical teenager he smoked pot and got drunk with his friends on the weekend.. which I was guilty of too, but I still managed to have a 3.5 and made more good than bad choices.
Now, over time he became more and more of a stoner.. Today, he's a complete stoner/pot head because of his dad's crappy influence, and there's nothing I can really do about it. I love him to death, I lost my virginity to him, he's extremely comitted to me (other girls haven't been a big issue) but the drugs! and the new addiction to cigerettes! and the lies about the drugs and cigerettes make me so unattracted to him when we're not together because I think of what a god damn loser I'm dating.. How can a year and a half go by- and my eyes NOW open to this nieve, stubborn, stupid piece of crap boyfriend who's given me more scars on my heart than anything else in my 15 and half years of living.
That sounds bad.. lol, but I seriously think he needs my help the MOST right now, I think he looks to me for positive things so when we fight.. his whole life is crap because I am one of the FEW good things in his life.. besides his dad, his (verrrry not so great) car, and his loser ass friends.. but I'm probably the only thing that won't physically leave and abandon him.. like his MOM who wants to kick him out when he's 18! I just DONT want to be his mom, I DONT want to tell him what he can & can't do...
I've tried getting mad, I've tried telling him I was dissapointed, I've tried being OKAY with it, I've tried making deals with him (If you don't smoke, I won't drink) but that backfired and I ended up getting lied to about it.. And DUMPED (but he's also bipolor.. so he took it back the next day, not reallling stressing about that.. cuz I did absolutly nothing wrong.)
I'm at a deadend, my friends say dump his ass, my mom says do what's in YOUR control (no idea what that is), his mom says I need to "put my foot down" which I will soooo not do because I'm not trying to scare him away nor make him feel like I'm being his mother in any type of way, because he will resent me, I am just hoping someone with an outside opinion who can just read this and see both sides because I wouldn't be with him unless he had some good qualities which are; I love him & care about him more than I care about myself, He loves me more than anything, we get along soo well, we laugh, we go on adventures.. It's legit.. but when we're not together.. his descions.. I just don't know what to do.
HELPPP!!
