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Why does my boyfriend doesn't wanna have sex with me in a regular basis?

My boyfriend and i have been together for almost 2 years. For the first year of our rough relationship, sex was still good eventhough i don't get it as often and as much as i want to. I am sexually active. I am not a nympho but i love sex. After a year of dating or not even, our sex life just started to go downhill. It so rare that we have sex. If i don't bitch, i wouldn't even get it. I've been wondering why he's not into me anymore. Everytime i confront him about it, asking him if i'm not desirable enough. He would tell me that i always turn him on. But i don't get some? I really don't get it. There are some guys who complain that their girlfriends doesn't give it to them that often and here i am willing to give it to him... Please advise... it's really messing up with my self esteem.


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177 helpful answers

Open the pod bay doors HAL

Sounds to me as if you're either begging or brow beating him into satisfying your needs. I don't know why he's not into it but that doesn't appeal to me. I suggest giving him some time and some distance. Let him come after you. If he's a normal guy, and he's not seeing another girl, I promise you that you will be fighting him off in a very short time. Let him do the work for a change and see what happens.

 
3 helpful answers

i wish i had to fight off my gf!  he's either seeing someone on the side, or is gay.  how old are you two?  if you're under 50, there's no reason for a man to have a low sex drive.  maybe he needs viagra or something?  maybe he doesn't like condoms?  either way, it seems like you two are sexually incompatible.  you need to figure out if you can accept that or not

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Well, thanks for the answer.  I've been really thinking about it... that we might not be sexually compatible at all.  We are both under 50.  I'm 27 and he's turning 37.  I've been with an older man before and age has nothing to do with the sex drive.  I tried talking to him about it but everytime i bring it up.. we just end up arguing.  He gets so defensive even though im not trying to argue.  I just wanted to resolve the problem.  I don't know but even giving some space wouldnt even work.  I went for a vacation and hoping that when i come back he'll be all over me... But no, he didn't even touch me.  Maybe it's time to re-evaluate the relationship.  I love him but the question now is, does he love me too?... Oh well...

 
177 helpful answers

Open the pod bay doors HAL

I'm with you on this one Erwin. Guys get horny even when they are in bad relationships and when aa 37 year old guy doesn't want sex at all there's definitely a reason and another sex partner is one possibility but there is another to consider. I recently talked to a guy who's into chat rooms and internet porn to an extent that he no longer has any desire for sex with his wife. He thinks the marriage is fine but admits that she's wearing out her vibrator and he is concerned about her having an affair. Crazy, if you don't have any reason to think there's another sex partner this is a possibility. 

 

 I  wish I had an answer   Maybe Rorri Peaton  loves you as his friend   and he will call you when he gets out of town    He doesn't  like it that you call him too much

 
9 helpful answers

Passion is the source of our finest moments...the joy of love...they clarity of hatered...and the ecstasy of greef...

May-be he is not that into you anymore. The sex is a lot usually at the beginning of the relationship where you can't get enough of each other and do it every day several times a day, but time passing, depending on different things, it either stays the same or what you used to have becomes a distant memory. If you can't talk to him about it and only end up arguing, I believe it is better to re-evaluate the relationship. Take a break. May-be things will change, if not, someone else, sooner or later, will cross your path.

Good luck.

Posted 2009-07-04T15:01:36Z
Angelina was invited by Yedda to answer this question.

 
50 helpful answers

"LEARNING is fundamental!"

God, Country, Self..in that order.

VISION, Change and Education=PROGRESS

Dear crazymadz,

If your boyfriend is avoiding sex and doesn't want to talk about it, you should move on.  You cannot possibly get into his head, so you will continue to be frustrated with him.  There are plenty of men that will give you the attention you desire.  Begging is not attractive and is a turn off.  Men like to chase and hunt women.  If he's not chasing you now, he won't be chasing you in ten years.  Why waste your time on him?  I would leave.  Find another man that will give you love, passion, and fulfillment.  You deserve to be happy! Laughing

 
13 helpful answers

The truth is, men get lazy and complacent. There could be other things that cause him angst like work or family problems. 

I hear stories about girls leaving their partners because the men don't want sex ever quite a lot and he needs to know you're serious about this being a problem to you. I know of one woman who used to masturbate loudly right next to her bf in bed and he still wasn't interested! 

You shouldn't have to compromise on the things in a relationship that are important to you. Confront him and let him know how unhappy you are, if he isn't willing to work on it with you then i'm sorry, he's not worth your time. 

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