I just got out of a two and a half year relationship. well in actuality, the relationship title changes back and forth but he loves me like no other. he loves me regardless of lots of the crazy situations we have encountered. He has been very loyal and faithful to me, but i think our connection grew on me. I will not deny how i love him. we have an undeniable connection. our personalities connect so well but physically we are average. He was my first, and only love, i haven't been with anyone else. Sometimes i think he may be the one but how will i know if i haven't had any experiences. I feel as though our relationship is only going one way because it is SO serious and i owe myself a chance to live first because i have forever to commit to him but i am afraid of losing him. He truly is one in a million. Now, i met a guy who is the ideal idea of what i would want in a man physically. In terms of his personality i am still getting to know him but as picky as i am he fits. He is polite, courteous, and very straight forward. I haven't been one to let guys get close very easily but things with him just flow so well. I never think of how far things will go or for that matter fantasize about intimacy with someone else, but he has been the cause of it all. He has me all confused about where i want to be. We have been messing around for a month now, but yesterday we had a breaking point where we discussed what we want from this, and he told me he is in no search or need for a relationship right now but he definitely likes me and it seems it could be more than a physical thing. Our hanging out has been consistent, and we have had dates. Now our form of communication is texting, but we see each other practically every other day. We are co workers but the interest was instant. Sexually, he has never pressured me into being with him. Although he did perform oral sex on me. I haven't given him any, nor returned any type of favor, but our kisses and touching are so passionate and intense. He wants me, and lets me know when he looks and me and touches me. i am a traditional girl, and believe intimacy should only be shared with one that you are committed to while in a relationship. The relationship doesnt have to be instant love, but it has to be monogomous. I dont want to share partners. now im torn in between the two. Is this ideal man with me just for the physical and sexual? Am i letting a good thing go just to settle for less? or could this mean im losing focus on my first love>? am i acting reckless because im in lust with another man!? should i stop and work things out with my ex?? HELP ME!
