Spicing Up Married Sex Life

This is a great question because things can get stale after a number of years. Several years ago there was a commercial (I think it was for some yougert) where the french maid is sitting on the middle aged guys lap feeding him when a kid comes in and the punch line is "you're home early". That could have been my wife and myself. We're married (20+ years now) and I'm fortunate that she is very uninhibited and has no problem experimenting in ways to make our sex life fulfilling. For example, we like videos, toys and fantasy roleplay. She has several wigs and outfits I enjoy her in so on those occasions "when the time is right" our love making gets very exciting and even a little on the erotic side. I also get occasional  graphic phone calls while at work, with her letting me know she's really in the mood and my work productivity goes up (lol, no pun intended) in a hurry because I can't wait to get home. One thing I must warn you about; if you decide to try a hot phone call just make sure he has a private work area.

Another spicy idea is to take him to a private place where there are no distractions. Motels can be great fun but a more economical thing is to go for a walk in the woods where you can ... well, you'll know what to do when you get there.

Some things may not be comfortable if you've never done them before so don't get to discouraged if the earth doesn't move the first time. Some things just take Practice, practice, practice.

I agree with Gary, get out of the bedroom.  Be a little slutty, wear something short so he accidentally sees something.  Tease him, lead him on, play wiht his mind a little.  Touching is great, but the mind works better.  If there are children in the house get out of the house.  A lunch time meeting at a motel if nothing else.   Don't just do things like this on the times you expect something, do it more often and sometimes the emotion takes over and it just happens, which is what you both want anyway.  Little notes in his bill fold or pocket that say "guess what I'm thinking about" or something like that is also good.   It's worked for almost 50 years.

Everyone who has answered has great replies...Bravo!!  I am glad to read that folks are keeping married life wonderful.  Great answers!  I say definitely role play a little and go to a romantic spot for a change and pamper one another.  Wish you many more happily married years!

Try any thing and i do mean anything you both might enjoy it also as you and him set the rules now with all rules out the door anything goes and who cares its your life live it to the fullest.Experment get toy videos and give it a try.

All good answers above, so I will not elaborate but simply tell you that Keeping Sex Lively in Marriages is a common problem and concern ... most couples hit that point (to greater or lesser degrees) at some point in the marriage.  Just like eating a great steak, if you did it everyday it would lose some of its appeal after while; that's just basic human nature.

Therefore, smart couples realize this (sooner or later) and they do various things to "vary the menu" so to speak (and no pun intended there).  That is what all the previous posts are suggesting... METHODS and TECHNIQUES to bring variation and fun back to marital sex, to overcome "same ole, same ole" effect (that otherwise tends to be inevitable).

SUGGESTION:  There are many books on this top, some by sex therapists and psychologists and psychiatrists and some good books by others on the topic.  Go to a book store and browse, pull some off the shelf and sit and read them and find the book(s) that work well for you.  Note the big bookstores (Barnes, Nobles; Boarders; Books A Million and more) make it comfortable for you to sit and read their books before (or without) buying them.

Also, do search on the internet as there is a lot written on it on the internet too.  If you want scholarly, detailed and more technical explanations, you should do research of SCHOLARLY ARTICLES (contact your university or library and ask them to show you how to do that, if you don't know how ... those sites are not so readily available on the "web" but you can get to them).

Don't be inhibited; you and your husband should make this a project:  How to Improve our Sex Lives.  If he is not interested in that, then you do have a problem and another kind of book and therapy would be called for.  Mostly likely you can get him "into it" without too much difficulty, if you take the lead.

Good luck,

ROB